• WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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    6 days ago

    I gave what I think I should to my family, they should be able to make it with that. If they fuck up, I don’t really feel that I must continue to support them. I will go full AWOL in that case. Anything is better than spending your life for someone else’s family.

    (I have no partner/child, just parents and brother. Idk what to do about my brother, I give him 2k allowance a month to teach him financial literacy).

    • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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      6 days ago

      Between my parents and my sister-in-law I have 3 adults I’m anticipating I might have to financially support at some point in the future.

      My sister in law is entirely financially supported by her partner who’s 40 years older than her, but they have no savings to speak of, and she’s spent her entire adult life scraping by and hasn’t worked a single job for more than a year and has been fired from every job she’s held. Their primary income is her partner’s social security disability payments and a small amount of retirement income from when he was working. Whenever he dies (which it’s honestly incredible that he’s still alive because he’s done nothing to help his body and everything to hinder its continued survival) she’s going to be completely SOL, so we’ve already accepted that she will have to move in with us.

      My parents might have finally started actually budgeting, and that was only after I bought their plane tickets to a funeral without it being a major financial hit for me and then they heard me talking finances and long-term financial planning with another relative and realized it’s past time for them to shape up. I don’t know whether or not they have actually been budgeting, and I don’t know if they have a stable retirement to look forwards to. I also can’t stand them for more than a few hours at a time so we absolutely can’t share a house with them.

      Right now my medium term plan is to get a house that’s more appropriate for 5 people, then later construct an ADU in case my parents need it (and I’d probably rent it to a friend in the mean time) and later on one or both of my kids can probably rent the ADU from us to help them build independence and real world living skills. I’m not thrilled that I have to be the financially responsible one, but here I am so I might as well make the best of it

      • PolarKraken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 days ago

        I play this role in my family too, have for a long time. I have a “good” job, and I’m extremely grateful, but even with that we’ve been solidly losing ground for a few years now. Had to make increasingly kinda desperate moves to retain the required stability to be able to just predictably house myself and my loved ones, both the present folks under my roof and keeping an eye toward the future.

        All signs (to me) point to this situation getting much worse, and I see no concrete expectations of improvement on the horizon. Can’t think of one hopeful signal. And I know very, very well that my family and I are clearly among the more fortunate, all things considered.

      • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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        6 days ago

        Wtf, 40 years older. He is not even rich by the sounds of it.

        What happened here?

        To be fair, my family is probably going AWOL also, knowing them. But I’d like to spend most of my time in peace and solitude to unfuck myself.

        Of course, I’m talking about a situation where I think I will probably die.

        EDIT: My grandpa spent his life supporting us and building a massive house, only grandma left to maintain it, and no one actually wants to live there…he died just before he got his rights to a pension.