I was exposed to a bad PTSD trigger on Saturday and dissociated for a bit and have been in a state of derealization since. Now that my therapist helped me not panic about this feeling, I’ve found myself curious about how other people have experienced this.
For me, everything seems muted. People and their expressed emotions, colors, general vibes in different situations etc. Everything is just wrong and unsettling. It’s like everything just isn’t existing enough to feel tangible. Iam fully aware that my perception is very wrong because I’ve asked people if things seem off at all and they’ve said no. I was very scared for like two days until I was able to book an appointment with my therapist and now I’m not as scared and the derealization doesn’t feel as disconcerting, but it’s still there. Hoping things will be back to normal when I wake up in the morning.
Foggy and cloudy, the stuff going on inside your head mutes out the outside world. Sometimes you hear people talk and it sounds like gibberish for a few seconds. Sometimes it feels like your on autopilot and just leaving your meat suit to do its own thing. You sometimes zone in and have no idea why you wandered into the kitcken knowing your not going to bother cooking. Everyone is suspicious. It feels like your brain hit the breaks and refuses to spin back up, or its more cozy to not let it. Feels like your running on 2 hours of sleep and not the 14 hours you took.
You come back to once your mind is calm but it takes work and some days its just going to be a blur or feel like a set back. Don’t doomscroll and find something hands on to occupy your mind or it will keep thinking about it and keep you zoned out.