I bought a safe. wtf do I need a safe for?

  • rabber@lemmy.caEnglish
    9·
    2 天前

    When I went through a breakup two years ago, the first day I bought a $200 bong made out of titanium

    You can literally drive over it with a pickup truck, it is amazing

  • Treczoks@lemmy.world
    21·
    3 天前

    A rubber egg. Sold at an odds-and-ends booth at a teaching fair, this egg looks like a real, brown-shelled chicken egg. More than once I’ve dropped this “egg” in front of people while cooking.

    • Kaput@lemmy.world
      11·
      3 天前

      Also have one. I keep placing it among the réal eggs. it got boiled once . wife ans kids triéd to crack it a few times. Latest win was placing it in my daughter’s makeup kit. It looks a lot l’îke one of her spongy thingy.

  • early_riser@lemmy.world
    7·
    2 天前

    Safes aren’t just for theft prevention. Indeed the small ones probably don’t do anything in that regard ,but many are fireproof as well, so you can keep documents safe if your house burns down.

    I’ve made way too many impulse purchases but off the top of my head I can’t think of one that’s “funny”.

  • nik9000@programming.dev
    9·
    3 天前

    8 inch googly eyes. Put them in the Christmas tree.

    Test tube full of little googly eyes. When I’m feeling depressed I stick them to random stuff around the house.

      • raldone01@lemmy.world
        2·
        2 天前

        My fridge has some. My monitors used to have some too but those damn new thin bezels. :why_holding_up_hands_and_looking_up_in_slight_anger:

  • Tujio@lemmy.world
    49·
    3 天前

    I went over to my old boss’s house one time and saw a car under a cover. He explained that it was a custom ultralight racer built off the chassis to a 1967 Lotus Europa. I was blown away and said that I hadn’t realized he was a car guy.

    He laughed and said “I’m not. Don’t go on ebay drunk.”

  • moonshadow@slrpnk.net
    17·
    3 天前

    Buddy living on a friends couch dropped $8k on a Hayabusa despite having no idea how to ride a bike at all and the town this took place in having no paved roads. Financed the thing too. Kinda wonder where he ended up sometimes

  • CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world
    10·
    3 天前

    I bought a hand made squirrel shaped water pitcher at a ren fest. It was like $200. Pretty sure it’s one of a kind and you won’t be able to Google what it looks like.

  • happydoors@lemmy.world
    4·
    3 天前

    Girlfriend broke up with me so I proceeded to buy a $900 motor scooter (fast mo-ped). My best friend also wrecked it and bent the front wheel after owning it for approximately 30 minutes. It did not bring all the girls to the yard but it was fun!

  • durinn@programming.devEnglish
    21·
    3 天前

    A high quality love doll. I believe I paid 1600 bucks for it. Used it for about six months while my depression was at its worst. That was a year ago. How the f does one discard a love doll?!

            • nylo@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
              13·
              3 天前

              ah gotcha, always puts me on edge seeing 88 in a username as it’s a very common neonazi dogwhistle (8th letter of the alphabet)

                • tal@lemmy.todayEnglish
                  7·
                  3 天前

                  “H” is the eighth letter of the alphabet, so “88” is often used as a shorthand for “Heil Hitler”. It sometimes gets incorporated into usernames.

                  searches

                  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/88_(number)

                  In neo-Nazism

                  Neo-Nazis use the number 88 as an abbreviation for the Nazi salute Heil Hitler.[11] The letter H is eighth in many European Latin alphabets, whereby 88 becomes HH.[12]

                  Often, this number is associated with the number 14, e.g. 14/88, 14-88, or 1488; this number symbolizes the Fourteen Words coined by David Lane, a prominent white supremacist.[13] Example uses of 88 include the song “88 Rock ‘n’ Roll Band” by Landser, and the organizations Column 88 and Unit 88.

                  The number is banned on Austrian license plates due to its association with “Heil Hitler [and] where H comes in the alphabet”.[14] In June 2023, the Italian Football Federation (FIGC) and the Italian government announced that the number 88 would be banned from use in Italian association football, as part of a joint initiative to combat antisemitism. This followed an incident in March of that year in which a Lazio supporter wore a club shirt bearing the name “Hitlerson” and the number 88, which led to the supporter receiving a lifetime ban from attending Lazio matches.[15]

                  In the US, former FBI assistant director of counterintelligence Frank Figliuzzi declared in 2019 that something as innocuous as raising a flag on the White House to full staff on 8 August (i.e. 8–8) is a “messaging” problem because “the numbers 88 are very significant in neo-Nazi and white supremacy movement.”[16]

                  https://www.adl.org/resources/hate-symbol/88

                  88 is a white supremacist numerical code for “Heil Hitler.” H is the eighth letter of the alphabet, so 88 = HH = Heil Hitler. One of the most common white supremacist symbols, 88 is used throughout the entire white supremacist movement, not just neo-Nazis. One can find it as a tattoo or graphic symbol; as part of the name of a group, publication or website; or as part of a screenname or e-mail address. It is even sometimes used as a greeting or sign-off (particularly in messages on social networking websites).

              • durinn@programming.devEnglish
                3·
                3 天前

                This’ll have to be a placeholder xD

                The crane is - alongside the tortoise - a symbol of longevity in Japan :D

    • jtzl@lemmy.zip
      14·
      3 天前

      I assume you dump it in a creek like an old tire.

      “Good evening, officer. No, I was just… Uhhh… Can I just pay the fine?”

      • durinn@programming.devEnglish
        3·
        3 天前

        Not too shabby, but I think I’m gonna do some research. I’m thinking Edgar Allan Poe, some Stephen King and maybe even some Junji Ito before I decide on what my next step should be.

      • durinn@programming.devEnglish
        4·
        3 天前

        Hm… I’ll just check the current market value of bodily fluids per ounce so I don’t get ripped off. :D

    • Apytele@sh.itjust.works
      4·
      3 天前

      I would assume you dispose of the parts that frequently touched your bodily fluids and list the “frame” and where to purchase replacement parts in the eBay listing. Somebody out there wants a sex doll and only has $500. Or contact the manufacturer.

      • durinn@programming.devEnglish
        2·
        3 天前

        Oh boi… Just when I thought this thread couldn’t get any weirder xD image finding a cut out pussy in the dumpster XD

        But in all seriousness, it doesn’t have any detachable parts. It’s cleaned internally with a douche and externally with wipes. :)

    • early_riser@lemmy.world
      2·
      2 天前

      I love worldbuilding and lore, even for franchises I’m not otherwise invested in. In 2018 I devoured every wiki article and YT video I could on 40K. I thought the AdMech was a really cool faction (still do, actually ⚙️💀) and looked into the models. Nope. I’m not paying that much for a sprew full of plastic that I’ll inevitably mess up.